Communicating for results in the face of disappointment
Communicating for results in the face of disappointment
Do you remember a time when a product or service failed to deliver as promised? On top of unmet expectations,
frustration and anger, is the added conflict of complaining.
Avoid damage to yourself and to your connection with the people you want to resolve your situation. No amount of crying from helplessness, yelling obscenities and displaying anger will help communication, nor will it truly get you what you want – a satisfactory result.
Complaints as a Two-Way Tool
Serve your interests best by crafting a complaint letter or call to minimize anger and maximize the opportunity for a mutually satisfactory resolution. Let’s reframe complaints as a positive expression that allows you to:
Express yourself and relieve tension about unfairness or a slight you feel
Help the person or organization you are complaining to by bringing an error or failure to their attention
Create the opportunity to fix something before more damage is done. You may be helping to correct:
– Safety issues
– Poor service levels
– Environmental adjustment
– Lack of training
A complaint can be a gift. It can be a source of profit in terms of learning, improving or even keeping current and attracting more customers.
Furthermore, if you think of your complaint as a negotiation, your tactics for finding the best solutions might include the following actions:
o Separate the people from the problem
Frustration with something gone wrong should not confuse the problem and the people.
Work to eliminate the natural human response of defensiveness in the person who will deal with your complaint. The fewer obstacles you put in front of folks, including their own emotions at the moment, the easier you are making it for them to help you.
o Simply relay the facts
Simply stick to the facts and you’ll avoid the tendency to blame. This is one place where a first person account of the facts as you experienced them is in order. “When I pressed the lever it broke off.”
o Keep It Short
Think brief at the outset. Your focus on the facts should close with a brief statement that repeats your interest in reaching a resolution that is satisfactory to both parties. A short, pleasant one-page letter is ideal.
Like apologies, complaints handled well can lead to new and unexpected allies in the customer service department.
o The bonus of the better nature
Appeal authentically to a person’s higher nature. A simple phrase such as “I would appreciate your assistance,” helps bridge a person’s official job of dealing with your complaint and their loyalty to their employer.
An attack on the person or the company does not bring out the best in a person. A better result and less conflict come from you allowing them to feel that helping you is also helping the company.
o Focus on Interests Rather than Positions
It’s hard for anyone to back down from an outright demand. Aim for a position of consensus that calls on the best interests of all. Suggest you are open to finding of a solution that works for your and the company.
Thinking ‘interests’ preserves your flexibility and shows you are open to negotiate. State your facts of loss or need for repair and add that you’d “like to find some way to improve the situation.”
Improvement may mean replacement of a defective item, better service or simply your confidence in continuing to be a customer. You may now be seen as a partner – a solution for your loyalty, or valued input on the product.
Feeling ignored?
Try again.
This time add the name or at least the position of the manager or a higher up company official. Write a similar letter, but reference the first letter.
Still ignored?
Step up the intensity and note consequences such as a complaint to a supervising bureau (like Better Business). Work to avoid a threat situation as you may not have that ideal, mutually-satisfactory conclusion we started today’s topic with!
VIP: Do remember that a real human is reading your letter and they are doing their best and likely want to help you. Give them the chance to correct the situation and they may go out of their way to meet your needs.
Next time, the give and take of workplace criticism.
